Grief is stinging this morning. Stinging my face like the wind on a bitter cold day.
{Amazing Grace How Sweet The Sound}
My brain understands that our bodies weren’t made for this world. But my heart just doesn’t get it today.
I am still in shock.
My heart is broken for Connie’s family.
Broken!
{That Saved A Wretch Like Me}
And it’s broken for us all over again.
{I Once Was Lost, But Now I’m Found}
I see your sweet wife, your beautiful mother, and your amazing mawmaw. And my brain says ‘Cami, she is in the place with no more pain, no more tears, forever rejoicing. The place she was created for. The place WE ALL were created for.’ And yet I can’t understand how we won’t see her here anymore.
My brain knows.
My heart does not.
{Was Blind But Now I See}
And all the while in this deep disbelief, He says ‘this grace that I have is for you, this grace is constant and this grace is amazing.’
God, I don’t understand, I don’t get it.
Please remind my heart who You are, today.
Please.
Cami..as I was reading your post this song came to mind “tell me once again who I am to you who I am to you…tell me less I forget who I am to you that I belong to you”. In times like this it is so hard to remember that we belong to Him. As I wait to hear the results of my breast MRI I don’t exactly find comfort in that thought as I usually would. Instead I am reminded that I belong to Him, I am His, my times are in His hands. I don’t get to choose because He has already decided when He will bring me home and it could be in a short while or 50 years from now. So I guess while these facts are not always comforting they remind me that it is futile for me to fight to understand His ways. Like a Father, He is telling me that He knows best and I am just going to have to trust Him. 🙂 I love you.