We got another letter from Ana this past week.
She told us about her family & what she likes to do for fun.
So now it’s our turn to send her some love.
They made little paper presents for her this weekend…
D made her a beautiful 3D snowflake…
O worked on a cross that you fold open…
And these 2, colored pics for her {mermaids? – sure, why not?}…
Praying for Ana as we think of Lulu, especially today.
I smell you when I am rubbing lotion on Boo after her bath.
I touch you when I hold your blanket near.
I taste you when I nibble on Simon’s cheeks.
I see you when I look at your daddy laying on the couch asleep.
I hear you when the wind blows through the chimes on our back porch.
It doesn’t know when it has been a month…
two months…
six months…
a year…
Grief is still as strong as our first day without you, Lulu.
It may not come every day like it once did.
But when grief does show up, it covers like a blanket.
Heavy on my chest.
Oh, what I would give to be holding you on my chest today.
It’s been quiet over here {or at least as quiet as it can be with 4 kiddos home from school & family visiting & a trip away}.
As I think back over our Christmas & New Years, I know I want to be intentional with time as I start 2012.
The time that we have been together recently has reminded me so much of the time we had with Lulu…
Slowing down & just soaking in everything.
Time with my husband, time with our kiddos, time with family & friends,
And most importantly time with God.
I may have to remind myself daily, but I want this new year – this fresh start to be more than ‘just a resolution’.
Boo and I went shopping. As we were walking past the baby section, Boo saw this little onesie and asked if we could get it for Lulu. At first I didn’t know what to do. Can we still buy things for Lulu?
Boo looked up at me and asked, ‘what does it say?’
‘little sister’, I answered
‘that’s what Lulu is to me’, she exclaimed, ‘can we get it?’
There are still times I’m not sure what to do, sometimes it is the everyday life that confuses me. Are we doing the right things?
And other days, I know exactly what to do…
I heard a song yesterday that said…
“Hope means holding on to You;
Grace means You’re holding me, too”
How blessed are we that even when we are not holding on – He still does?
We have so much to be thankful for this Christmas.
Owen was up late with us last night, talking away.
It’s fun to hear what’s on his mind {he’s usually the quiet one}.
He told us, a girl in his class {who also goes to our church}, went to Build A Bear and made a bear with hearts all over it and named her bear Lulu Grace.
I love it that even our kiddo’s friends still remember.
*Just a reminder that the birthday give-a-way will be open through this Friday*
Our pastor shared this line yesterday in his sermon and it has been ringing in my ears since. Someday’s are easier to live by that. Someday’s it becomes a choice. The past week was a heavy one, most definitely, with daily up and downs. At times we choose to stay in and quiet ourselves and give in to the grief that was so overwhelming. Other times we smiled through our tears and saw brightly the blessings that our life is filled with. It is a “see-saw” life right now, to say the least. But it is our life. I believe that God gave us our emotions {and yes, He generously blessed me}, not to rule our lives but instead to help us feel His GREAT love.
We know in our head His promises He has given all of us.
Choose to live by those.
We feel in our hearts His deep, wide love for us.
Choose to feel it pull you in close today.
“This IS the day that the Lord has made
let us REJOICE and be glad in it”
Psalm 118:24
We miss you deeply sweet Lulu Grace.
We give thanks today for being able to hold you here on earth.
And we give thanks that we will hold you again when we see you in heaven.
“REJOICE in the Lord ALWAYS and again I say REJOICE”
Philippians 4:4
Lulu's Grace 